It came to pass in the year of our Lord 1995 that the first printer moved into our household. An inkjet printer whose volume announced its work to everyone across several floors. It was clunky and ugly to boot. And even though paper was still the dominant medium for communication and information transfer back then, a private household still only had to print something every few weeks.

Alright, a teacher in the house had an increased need, especially at the beginning of the school year and during exam periods. At least to get the original version from the computer into the physical world and from there to the school’s own copier. Printers were expensive, and printer ink even more so. Third-party inks didn’t exist back then, at least not readily available for everyone.

But even back in 1995, you spent the least amount of time actually taking out the printed pages. Paper jams and unusable print results were common companions even then. If the printer was running, you could easily print 30 pages. But woe betide if it sat unused for several days. Stiff rollers and dried-up ink were its revenge. The print head cleaning and print head alignment were always a joy. Loud, slow, and wasteful with expensive paper and expensive ink.

And it was only ever a temporary fix. Like Swiss clockwork, the printers would fail shortly after the warranty expired. Dried-up print head, cleaning no longer helps, the replacement part is about as expensive as a new device. So, a new device it was, in the hope of better print results and build quality.

Fat chance! Nearly 30 years have passed since then, and inkjet printers are just as reliable, if not worse, than they were before the turn of the millennium. At least the printers have gotten cheaper. But with advancing digitalization, printers are rarely needed anymore. When they are needed, however, it’s for important things and usually urgent. After months of sitting idle, the printer is fired up and the print job is started. Compared to the print result, the lottery is a better bet.

Either there’s some error message or the printout doesn’t look like it does on the screen. Either one color is empty or has dried up. But no matter what it is, it’s always something. By now, I am firmly convinced that the engineers at printer manufacturing companies are either sadists, or there are no engineers at all, and the manufacturers get their blueprints directly from hell.